10 Things you can only Learn Staying away from your Parents

Horrified, hesitant, depressed, nerve-wrecked, excited and what not! The emotions you go through when leaving your comfort-lubricated abode and ‘santa-parents’ for a fairly paid job and the craving for an ‘independent life’ can be overwhelming. But moving out isn’t all that hunky-dory, it is a hamper of challenges, challenges that may make you or break you or in the best case, enlighten you with the best lessons of your life that you had no scope of learning while living in with your parents!


10.) Real world isn’t all mills-and-boons but a game of uncharted.

When living away from your parents, you will encounter people, professionally or personally, professing their concerns with fake agony and worries for you, expressing their fondness when convenient and leaving you in times of need, manoeuvring to bring you down.

There are always those who’ll despise you but will always be “concerned” about your whereabouts when you are new in the city. They will pledge to guard you with their lives and then you’ll never see them, or maybe try finding them in the nearest ‘dumpsters for cheese-sticks’. There will be those who’ll want to take advantage of you or your money, they’ll bait you for their desperate needs, including hiding behind you when running into an aggrieved and starved dog! They will leave you shivering with a temperature 104º for more momentous and critical things to do, like attending parties or slogging their way on social media, streaming their ‘rocking lives’ and hovering over other’s!

In the end, when emotionally shattered and drained, you’ll TURN TO YOUR PARENTS and realise that only they will generously love and care for you and yearn for your success. They are the only living spectators with a desire to see you on top!


9.) The unforeseen love for your hometown.

Allow me to draw a clear picture, you spent your entire childhood at this place, scornfully mocking it and identified almost every area, every shop, every mall, every gym, every salon and every ‘tuition centre’ and now wanted to decamp to the opulent ‘Beverly hills’. While leaving for the airport/station, you snapchat umpteen number of pictures in every filter and rant your love out! You land in the new city and not-so-surprisingly, skeptically judge and compare the place to your hometown, making it sound better. The traffic, the water, the weather, the air, the ‘quality’ of oxygen, the people, the dogs, the ants – EVERYTHING, every freaking thing somehow reminds you of your own hometown and leaves you nostalgic with dewed-eyes and dripping nose.

In conclusion:

Once upon a time, there was a place, called hometown and dear Prince/ princess, never treasured it. The only time you gave it a thought was when you were drawing mental pictures of leaving and how you wanted to leave and of-coarse, the game plan! Now, hometown is left in the lurch and you are breathing dream-town, suddenly it hits you that maybe, you have feelings for hometown and now that you cant reach it, you turn into a jaded lover!

Now that’s a happy ending!


8.) The need to take care of yourself.

The first month is going to be laborious, both physically and emotionally. You will slowly realise the need to take care of your personal and health essentials, as you obviously cant let your mother taunt you in the first month itself as it might cost a dent in the crest of your ‘wall of fame’ and ‘fantasised self-respect’ (As far as I know, there isn’t any phrase called Child’s self-respect in the ‘chicken soup for good parenting!’)

You’ll suddenly start cribbing to attain a body like Dwayne Johnson or Lara croft!

You start waking up early, start making your bed tea on your own, cleaning your bed on time, pampering the maid’s behaviour, making your nutritious breakfast and eating it on time, hydrating your body efficiently, buying groceries, managing budget and all those million things that were nonexistent, even hypothetically.

Don’t worry, one month down the line and you’ll be proud of yourself, if you manage to save even one buck! (We all know, first month savouries are making their way from the restaurants!)


7.) The sudden value for money.

This is going to be crucial! There will be days when you’ll self-award yourself for saving 10 bucks in the auto or 100 bucks from a coupon at a grocery mart, and then there will be those days where you’ll see a beautiful dress or a dapper ripped-jean, or may be your maid will spoil your clothes or you might drop coffee on them (Purposely, of-coarse!), or a tiny thread might fall off your shirt or may be some other clothing catastrophe, and saliva starts dripping off your mouth, and then starts the drill of convincing oneself that you’ll manage, you’ll manage with less money but that piece of clothing needs to be bought for your survival, you’ll manage without Starbucks and make cold coffee at home, you’ll manage without subway salads and buy bargained cucumbers, you’ll manage without waffles and churros and maple syrup and have sweetened curd at home and will come to a prodigious decision of spending half the month’s salary (Congratulation on the oxygen cylinder!). Pat on the back for making the month dreadfully divine.


6.) You are loving the new freedom while missing the old one.

The new one comes laden in responsibilities and conditional happiness, while the old one was filled with doting dad’s monetary support and some mom-bucks! Cooking was just another word, cleaning was the definition of skin exfoliation, the only medium of cleaning clothes was the washing machine, the only physical effort applied was in the gym while lifting dumbbells, the only mode of transport was personal wheels, the alarm was another joke of the day, time-management was, a word and mom’s rant were apparently the rudest things you heard!

The new one requires you to do things- for real! The last time you did something on time was because you feared a vexed-dad attitude, this time, it’s going to be a vexed-boss’s exasperating lullaby and it might cost you materialistic losses, for example : your job!. The new isn’t all that bad too, its going to be the most educative and worthwhile experience of your life. There will be days when you’ll hate every part of the day and also days when you cant stop swooning with ecstasy, but don’t get swithered by hiccups, as these days will teach you the meaning of responsibility, independence and will make you appreciate your parents even more!


5.) The hidden behavioural aspect come to rise that you never expected.

You might have been expressive back at home, shouting at the top of your voice, ordering your mother to make something to eat, and informing her last minute about what you wanted to do, but adult life is a little different (The word little is serving as a sheath for the word ‘entirely’! Don’t mind.), here expressiveness can mean a lot of things, like drawing a line amongst friends and janus-faced backstabbers, relationship and acquaintanceship. You will have to define the way you want to be treated, narrowly distinguishing between an Emraan Hashmi or a Nawazuddin Siddique (Sorry for the referencing if you like Emraan!), both approaches are great as long as the one you chose doesn’t haunt you. You will have to stand sternly for your necessitate demands and not get pitched down by the authorities, this isn’t a singing competition and you don’t need to impress anyone as long as you are legit (In that case, I might cast a vote for you no matter how brutally you murder the song!). Trust me, you’ll come out strong, don’t be inhabitant while conveying your thoughts.


4.) Patience! Patience! Patience!

You’ll become more tolerant, as this time its not dad who’s paying the electricity and cellular bills.

You’ll understand the turmoil of keeping the spirits of ‘Queen Maid’ high and work yourself through to get the job done. You’ll learn a trick or two to keep the nosy neighbours happy and isolated from your personal life. You’ll dazzle every watchman, every junior at work, every maid, every inquisitive uncle/aunt, every cleaner, every society secretary, every boss and every ‘who-so-ever’ in order to keep it running smooth. You’ll endure every unjust favouritism with a painfully stretched smile from ear to ear because you require these people for operational sanity!


3.) Value for relationships

Your childhood friend may die out of shock, seeing your name flash on his/her touchscreen! But this is the perfect time for childhood rejuvenation or rekindling college days, when life was bed of delights!

You’ll certainly have more value and regard for the time you spend with your loved ones. This might cause damage if you don’t equip them with an advance notice for the sudden christmas of reverence. But just go ahead and let it out, after all who else in the new city is showing willingness to hear about your burdensome life.


2.) Maturity

YES, its attainable without pills (There aren’t no pills incase the last claim gave you hope!).

You will start to notice that every night when you’re on a Skype call with your parents, you’ll make sure that you’re not telling them the bad parts as the mortified and irked dad will already be on his way to catch a flight and next thing you know is that you need to pick him up from the airport, and the dramatic mother must’ve started to make a list of temples to visit already!

You start to deal with problems thoughtfully, without making reckless decisions like gulping in gallons of ice-cream to deal with stress. The outspoken-you will get shadowed by the diplomatic-you, just not enough to qualify for the position of a politician. You will spend wisely, dress wisely, talk wisely, eat wisely, act wisely but might sometimes forget to set a reminder for the above chores (That’s okay, you’re only human!).

On a serious note, you will start appreciating and respecting the value of time, relationships, and resources.


1.) You will finally know what you want from life!

A lot of people struggle with the quest for their passion as they fail to recognise their passion. But staying alone gives you the time, opportunity and perception to consider your options. Based on your experience, you can decide on what you want to do and what you don’t. Remember, accepting your weakness is a sign of strength, so work on them.

Somewhere in the midst of this expedition, you’ll carve your way to your personal and occupational desires, with an uncomplicated strategy to succeed, which sooner or later, YOU WILL!

Happy growing up, y’all!

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Aakanksha Nagar