There are no definite words to give meaning to the term “friendship”. Humans, as social animals, can’t help but mingle with their own in the society. But we form special ties with some people who we call our “friends”. Some friendships take years to find a strong holding and yet there are those friendships too that reach their zenith in a matter of minutes. So why do you think friends are important in our lives? Is it because they provide you with a new perspective? Any other person can do that. Is it because they think like you? There are many friends who are poles apart in their thinking and yet, there friendship is better than ever.
No, friends are not there just to add spice to your life. Friends are there to laugh with you in your happiness, to wipe your tears when you are down and to hold you and comfort you when you feel you have reached a new low in your life. They are like family. They are family. It’s very important to learn to distinguish between good friends and just friends. Not all friends have the qualities that makes your friendship sustain for a lifetime. It doesn’t mean that you don’t have a role to play. Both the parties are equally responsible for making a friendship work and last. That means not only your good friends but you, as a friend too, need to manifest certain qualities that will make your friendship shine brighter through the years.
9. Respect. Period.
Any relationship needs a foundation. And I feel that “respect” is the stepping stone to every relationship. Friendship is no different. A good friend should respect and he should earn your respect too. There may be certain situations where you would be wrong and your friend would take a stand against you. Don’t fret. Just learn to listen to your friend’s advice. You’ll surely respect him more once you learn that he had been correct and looking out for you the whole time.
There’s no doubt that honestly is the essence of a friendship. How can you rely on a person when you are not even sure whether he’ll be honest to you or not? There’s no use being friends with a person who always lies and is dishonest on your face. A genuine, good friend will always be honest to you. It doesn’t matter whether you like the truth or not but he’ll make sure that you learn the hard truth from him rather than fall prey to sweet lies. In fact, you bear the same responsibility. If you want to be a good friend hen, you need to learn to be honest with your friend too. Yes, tact and politeness come to your rescue when you have a bitter truth to tell but remember, he’ll always appreciate you more when he realizes that you are not scared of being honest to him.
7. No Judgement shall be passed.
True, good friend will never judge you, no matter who you are and what you do. They know you from the inside out. Nothing you do will ever surprise them. And if you do manage to do something unexpected, be assured, they will never judge till they hear you out.
Even when you are at fault, they’ll not convict you through harsh judgement but will help you get on the right path. That’s what good friends are there for. They’ll never, ever let you go astray.
6. A shoulder to cry on.
Remember those times when you are so sick and tired of the world around you that you just want to flop down and cry your eyes out? Or remember those days where your hormones are causing havoc to your moods? Who comes to your rescue? Only a true friend!
A good friend will not even ask you why you’re crying. He’ll just silently sit beside you, offer you his shoulder to cry on and will wait for you to calm down. You always know in your heart, wherever you are, that he’s always there for you.
5. A good listener is always appreciated, folks.
Who doesn’t like an attentive listener? Mind you, it’s not easy to find a person who not only listens to your entire monologue (or a dramatic monologue in most cases) but also offers you advice at the end. If you happen to have a friend like that, cherish him forever! Seriously, people these days don’t even have the time to listen to their own thoughts. A good friend, however, will give all his time for you if he feels that you badly need a good listener.
At the same time, if you want to be good friend, practice the art of listening. I know it’s cumbersome and annoying at times but trust me, once your friend realizes how attentive you are to his needs, he’ll love you all the more.
4. Sharing is caring.
That’s the first lesson that we learn at home. Remember those times when we were kids and our parents would always teach us to share our belongings with our friends? Well, they weren’t wrong. Sharing is a very important part of any relationship. Sharing also requires a level of trust and intimacy which can only be forged if you not only love but respect each other as human beings. So you need to learn not only to share but also to be grateful for a friend who always shares his/ her life with you.
3. A friend in deed is a friend indeed.
This is an often quoted proverb which actually happens to be true. Time reveals everything in its own way. You may have many friends to boast of but only a few of them can stand the test of time. So it is very important that you learn to distinguish between those who are your friends in name only and those who prove to be one. After all, a friend in deed is a friend indeed.
Trust. That’s a pretty heavy word with equally fragile bonds. You must have heard many a times that it takes one years to build trust but only seconds to break it. Well, it is a big responsibility to carry on. You can’t just take someone’s trust in you at face value. Similarly, you can’t just trust someone easily. It needs lots of TLC- tender, love and care. So always cherish a friend whom you can trust with your life.
I saved the best one for the last. Forgiveness. The very word gives you a sense of peace and relief. This trait is pretty uncommon (even in good friends). As hard as it is to ask for forgiveness, it’s doubly hard to forgive someone who have wronged you. Especially if that someone happens to be your friend. If you have a friend who forgave you when it was the hardest thing for him to do, then, tie him to yourself and never let him go! You are one of the few lucky ones who have been blessed with not an only a good friend but with the best one!
I’m sure we have our own ways of defining friends and friendships. Similarly, we all have our own ways of defining what a true friend really stands for. But we all will agree that a good friend is a real blessing in life. Life would be too boring if we don’t have our silly friends to mock us, kick us, laugh with us, care for us and love us! And we love them too!