That hand you can always hold, that shoulder you can always cry on, that hope you can always cling to, that warmth you can always feel from, that glare you are petrified of, that rebuke which ameliorates you, that love which enhances you and that strength that empowers you can be summed up in one word: PARENTS.
Parents are a reflection of God. God could not be everywhere, so he created parents. Parents are clever advisers, strict teachers, amiable mates, experienced philosophers , reliable guardian and ideal role models. They are like the Hawk, who spread their wings to shield their children from any kind of sorrow, misery, misfortunes, dilemma, obstacles and pain. Parents shed their blood and sweat to raise their children. Theirs is a debt that nobody can ever repay. Their love for their children is unparalleled and immortal.
Parenting is a task more difficult than that of Sisyphus pushing the boulder up the hill. Any carelessness and negligence can leave a deep scar in a child’s life. Thus, the parents have to perfectly balance between strict and friendly, calm and agitated and loving and letting loose.
Here are the 15 ideal parent qualities:
15. Modus Vivendi
Yes, compromise is the key. The generation gap between parents and their children can be a cause of a lot of conflicts and unrest. As puberty swings in, it also triggers a rebellious attitude in the children, giving rise to a lot of unsettling disputes between parents and children. Thus, the wisest decision at certain times is to compromise. “Compromise is the best and cheapest lawyer” -Robert Louis Stevenson.
14. Embrace the coronet of composure
Parenting is a duty that requires each parent have profusion of patience. Geoffrey Chaucer quoted, “Patience is a conquering virtue”, throwing light on the importance of maintaining your calm and composure. Parents must possess the art of balancing their anger and irritation when children test their patience.
Children are an embodiment of waggery, frolicsomeness, roguishness and naughtiness. As toddlers they tend to play with fire. As a gradeschooler, they boycott a plate full of nutrients. As teenagers, they play with your patience, as they shock you with their habits like disobeying, disrespecting, late night partying, cyber addiction and falling prey to unscrupulous company or habits. As young adults,some children fall into the trap of drug abuse. Thus, children always throw a challenge at the composure of their parents. So it is important to be calm and patient to understand your kid and maintain a healthy relationship with them.
Therefore, patience is one of the most important qualities that a parent must possess as children behave in an unruly and immoral manner at certain times and revolting and displaying fury will only add fuel to the fire. So breathe in, breathe out.
13. Say NO to taming
Refrain from caging the young and lively spirit of your children. Know how to control your child appropriately- Neither set them free as a bird, nor hold their reins to tight like that of carriage horses. Controlling or taming will only strengthen the agitator in them. Therefore, trust your children and give them freedom to a certain extent whilst keeping an eye on their activities.
12. Be sassy communicators
Communication plays a pivotal role in a parent-children relationship and thus, it is extremely essential to be wise, witty and sassy communicators as parents. Constant NO’s or refusals and rebuking does not define a good parent. Even while refusing to your child’s demands, be more reasonable so as to convey concern and not insecurity or distrust. Learn the art of conveying your ideas and opinions in an amiable manner, rather than an authoritative one.
11. Raise them the right way
Your child is the output of your upbringing. Make sure sure you inculcate them with pleasant and morally acceptable qualities. Play the role of their friend, philosopher and guide at each stage of their life respectively.
Moreover, it is also extremely essential to give time to your children. Make it a point to squeeze in time from your busy schedule for them. Giving time to your children is extremely essential as it leaves an everlasting impact on them. Therefore, your upbringing is what moulds the life of your children.
10. Be the exceptional Buttinski
Being the best adviser and teacher for your children is one of the ideal parent qualities. Apart from inculcating children with morals and values, also be their advisers in times of need. Guard them, guide them and lead them on the path of righteousness. Teach your children lifelong lessons that will always surround them while taking a decision.
9. They v/s Them = Negative!
Always comparing your children to others is a BIG ‘NO-NO’. Parents must recognize and acknowledge their children’s capabilities and motivate them rather than putting them down by a comparison with a superior. Comparing your child with another child might give rise to low self-esteem in the children and destruction of their beliefs in their capabilities. Therefore, parents should keep miles away from comparing and work towards pushing and building their own children so that they can easily climb the ladder to success.
8. Don’t burden your child’s shoulder with the baggage of your dreams
For being an ideal parent, it is essential that you recognize the dreams and goals of your children and support them. Do not pressurize and burden your child with the dreams that you once say for yourself or for them. Let them follow their dreams and stand by their side and support them in achieving their goals.
7. Being ‘understanding’
Children go through a series of change in their life cycle which leads to problems, confusions, mood swings, etc. As parents, it is essential to understand the reason behind a child’s exasperation, at each stage of life. Parents need to be understanding and supportive of their children’s temperament and know the solutions to their problems. It is necessary for parents to be understanding as it also promotes their relation with their child, who can readily confide into them when any conflict arises.
6. Be an immaculate mirror
Your child is your reflection. It is from you that he/she inherits his/her habits, decorum, demeanor and dealings. Your children see you as an example as they grow and ape your ways of life. therefore, if you expect your child to be an embodiment of virtues, you must be one yourself. Correct yourself, be a good human, be compassionate, loving, caring and moralistic and your child shall learn from you and follow your footsteps.
5. Bet bottom dollar on your child
Trust and belief are the main ingredients for producing a healthy parent-children relationship.It is mandatory to trust your children and believe in their dreams and ambitions. Your trust in your child can give a much needed boost in their self-confidence, self-esteem and self-efficiency. Knowing their parents trust them can cause the child to refrain from any immoral activities that might threaten their parent’s honour. Thus, trusting your children comes with many advantages which strengthens your relation with them.
4. Be a rock-support for your child
Support your children in the activities, decisions and dealings of life in the different stages. Someday they might need your assistance with school projects, someday they might your your advice on relationships in college and someday they might need your support for achieving their goals. Stand by your child as steady as a rock, support them and guide them whenever and wherever required.
3. Become a friend before a parent
Parent is the first friend a child can ever have. Loosen yourself and talk to your child as if you are their age. This is essential as it enables children to confide in and pour their heart out to you, in case of any misery or conflict.
Children also go through a roller coaster ride of emotions and problems- Inability to deal with the academic pressure, inability to form healthy relationships, getting bullied at school or college by peers, etc. Thus, at all the different cycles of a child’s life, you must talk to them as their peer, allowing them to speak their heart out to you. Therefore, be frank, friendly and cordial with your children, so they know there’s always a friend that they can turn to.
2. Spread thy wings over thy children
Caring for your children is one of the inherent quality of ideal parents. Caring is another word for loving. Parents must make it a point to spread their wings over their children and shield, protect and guard them from problems and issues in their lives. They must show care and concern for the child’s health, education, relationships and behaviour. However, make sure you do not get over protective as this might cause rebelliousness in children
1. Be loving
“Nothing that you can teach them is more important than the love you can give them” goes a famous quote. Love is the most important factor that connects a child to his/her parents. A parent’s love for his child is unmatched and they must shower this love often on them. Love is what makes your child strong, confident and brave. Knowing he has the love, support and encouragement of his parents, the child can take up any challenges in his life. Every child is hungry for love. Therefore, make sure you display your love for hem in every way you can this will make the child inseparable from his parents and encourage him to walk on a moral path and protect his parents honour in all phases of life.
Every parent love their children in their own way and have their own method of displaying affection. However, by following the above tips, you can become an ideal parent that will make your children thank their stars for having a parent like you.