There’s nothing worse than Monday mornings except waking up while the roommate still gets to sleep. Worst is when they won’t budge on countless efforts of waking them up. You do not have to tear your hair out, neither theirs (maybe shave them though). Here’s how if you wake up they don’t get to sleep to. You’ll not only wake them up but have a good laugh too, at the priceless expressions or maybe just the fact that if you don’t get to sleep, they don’t get to sleep too. Now that is solace- pure bliss. The very fact that you’re not the only one who couldn’t sleep when they were sleepy. Here’s how to wake them up in the coolest and funniest way ever. The consequences ain’t my responsibility though.
10. Guide the Orchestra: Get Bathroom Singers alive
Always wanted to be a singer? Never got a chance? Here’s your once in a life opportunity to have your own concert with craziness unlimited. You might be croaking but there are no reality show judges to discourage you from displaying your talents. Also, you’ll have audience in the grumpy sleepy-head who just won’t wake up to all other efforts. You might be applauded with pillows and cushions hitting you in your face, but when it’s about your concert, you should be glad that you’ve got audience who is hearing. Dress your best too, maybe Elvis Presley style- you don’t want the person sleeping in front of you to be anything but shocked on waking up.
9. Get the boss to call them or Dad.. Or Doctor
If the boss is amiable, your job is half done. If the person’s scared of their father, it is more than half done. And if not- you always have the doctor. Ask the boss to call up a couple of hours before the scheduled meeting and reprimand for being late. You’ll have the laugh of your lifetime as the friend breaks their phone for the clock gone wrong and rushes mad to reach Boss. Or maybe if the friend lives alone, Dad could call and say, “Credit cards blocked, you better be out of bed.” Tragic for your friend but funny nevertheless. Or if nothing else works ask the doctor to call up on an appointment set for assessing a deadly disease in the body. I don’t know of anything else, but the nerves would sure be a wreck.
8. The Vagabond: Landlord demanding to vacate the Place
It’s frustrating when a person just won’t wake up. But would they not wake up if the landlord gives a surprise visit and starts throwing stuff down the balcony? Maybe even try to throw the person with their blanket out of the house and create panic for the place to be immediately vacated. All sleep will leave to not return in a while if one wakes up to this (unless the landlord has made the friend used to it). You might film one of America (or your country’s) funniest videos and be the big name on youtube. There’s nothing funnier than watching a friend wake up in the panic of being rendered homeless.
7. Good Morning: Away in a Supermarket
The friend is not a light sleeper? Or maybe the most dead sleeper ever with no consciousness of the surroundings. If your friend sleeps without sensation, you’ve got a good chance to drag them with their sleeping bags, abduct them in your car and take them to somewhere far off before they wake up. Don’t know where? Try somewhere in the middle of the supermarket. It won’t get any better. Imagine the priceless look on your friend’s face on waking up in a supermarket. Only if the friend does not wake up midway.
6. It’s time for Paintball: The Paint is edible
There’s no say you have over the person in terms of waking up? Maybe there are shots you might have then. If you can risk messing the room and the bed linen, you might just want to play paint ball- or food ball maybe with everything available in your kitchen from vegetable oil to tomato ketchup, maybe cherry tomatoes and spinach gets them some nutrition too. And they’d wake up like a kitchen or a salad which wasn’t dressed. Whatever be it. You’ll have your share of fun.
5. Give a makeover: The look of the year
Because the friend is too stubborn to budge and get a makeover for their own self for the day, you might get the job done too. All you need is lots of lipstick- maybe all the cosmetics stashed in the home, and if you have none- use coloured pens and paints. Though old, it is never out-dated. Want to do it with a change? Get the eyebrows shaved (or the arms for a male friend) or maybe a wacky hair cut they’d never want. Or maybe dress them up to your fantasy of your favourite cartoon character maybe. It’s a makeover. Instagram and Facebook can be held responsible for making it the look of the year.
4. Get them wrapped in a Bubble wrap
If the friend won’t wake up but just roll from one side to another, there’s a lot of fun you can have. Replace linens around with bubble wraps and each time the person moves, you can be in for a laugh. And they will have to wake up too, unknown to what just happened. Are not bubble wraps the most wonderful invention ever? Better alarm clocks than expensive smartphones. The person will have to budge.
3. It’s time to cook: and Oh it smells fishy
A good idea is to make sure your (or the friend’s) home smells like their favourite delicacy. You can get some cinnamon spray to use, or maybe just run the tedious process of actually cooking all of it (that’s time taking- you don’t want to be punished for waking up early. Do you? So raise an alarm for breakfast, or brunch or almost lunch and let the home smell of their favourite delicacy. Just when they wake up, they are told that they were too late. It’s trashed, either in your stomach or in the bin. Save yourself the grumpy look for the rest of the day though. And if it’s Mr. Husband you are doing that to, be sure the anniversary ain’t around the corner. You don’t want a hoax gift alarm now.
2. Panic Attacks: Reminiscing Romantic escapades
There ain’t no funnier event for a male friend waking up to a baby’s wails. And the note near the baby claims him to be the father- mother undisclosed. Be assured that he will never forget that morning. Be sure however that he’s been sexually active enough to have procreated. Also, if it’s the boyfriend or husband you’re trying to wake up- raise a pregnancy alarm when its least possible and watch the drama unravel. Why should girls have all the fun though? To trouble female friends you might bring their ex’s over with a mad speech to make. They’d freak out for sure- with someone from the past in their bedroom. Proceed with warning though, make sure that nothing you do has aftermaths on present relationships, that disaster management is quite a task. And also that nothing makes them revisit the past that hurts.
1. Priest and Black Magic: Rites underperformed
Alright so, if you’re from the east you’d know how they believe in superstitious rites and beliefs for those who they believe are sick or possessed by evil souls. Hire an actor who runs the act for you. Imagine your partner, friend or roommate waking up to a hovering over-dressed man reciting chants of life and spraying him/her with all sorts of powder, herb and paraphernalia or maybe just brushing their bodies with peacock feathers. They’d be mighty scared. And you mighty entertained.